Chocolate Sucks

Am I the only person on the entire planet, and maybe beings from other planets too that we don’t know about who jet down in their space ships in the dark of night to sneak into the Hershey’s factory and nip kisses when no one is looking, who doesn’t like chocolate?

At a recent social gathering, I was offered a piece of chocolate cake, and said “no thank you, I don’t like chocolate”. I have learned over the years that I have to explain why I don’t want dessert, or I get a lecture about how ‘you’re so thin you can afford it and a little won’t kill you and are you sure you won’t have some yadda yadda yadda.’ Why does everyone do that? If I don’t want to eat crap, why do people feel they have to talk me into it? Anyway, having given my explanation for not wanting a piece of cake, all conversation in the room stopped, and every head swiveled in my direction. If I had run into the house all bloody, wielding a large ax, screaming, “I just chopped up five people”, I don’t think the looks I got would have been any more horrified than they were by my simply saying that chocolate was not for me.

So now I am wondering, am I alone in this universe? Is there anyone else out there who doesn’t drool when passing brown mounds of sugary goo?