Having lived on a boat for most of the last six years, I have lost touch with a lot of modern advances. For example, back in the old days, when a smoke detector needed a new battery, it screamed an annoying beep at you every minute until you beat it to death with a broom handle, because it was a holiday weekend, all the stores were closed, you were fresh out of 9 volt batteries, and you decided that catching on fire and not knowing it would be highly preferable to hearing that piercing noise every minute.
This weekend, while staying in the home of friends, cat sitting for their two wildly entertaining felines, I heard the voice of GOD coming from above. Finally, proof positive! God IS a woman. And god wants us to know that the battery is low. She told me that intermittently for the better part of a day, while I pondered. And then, she stopped saying it, leading me to wonder…Did Jesus show up with a battery charger? Praise be, I was saved, since I had no idea how I was going to ascend to those lofty heights of that cathedral ceiling with a new battery.
