The size of it

I always like to hear the other side’s opinion, and I would like to know who thinks that leaf blowers aren’t on the top ten list of stupid inventions, and why these noisy, polluting, dust-making demons have a purpose. Just what is the point? Okay, so you get yourself a leaf blower and you go out into your driveway and start the blowjob. In short order, dust and debris are flying through the air, carried by the prevailing wind, to land…Where? All over your neighbors’ yard, drive, car, kids, etc? And in short order, don’t these particles simply blow back where they came from in the first place? What, exactly, have you accomplished, other than damaging your hearing and sinuses, as well as throwing a few more bits of carbon into the air? Is it an added bonus that you have managed to royally piss off the next door neighbor by blowing bits of grass and sand all over the fresh paint on the front porch? Jerk.

Maybe leaf blowers are simply an extension of the ‘small’ syndrome. By this I mean trying to make up for lack of stature by having big and/or loud stuff. Lack of stature doesn’t necessarily mean short, or small anatomy, but simply a person’s self image. One of the most blatant examples of the compensating factor is someone who drives a giant truck with mammoth tires. If this truck makes a huge noise as it bounces down the highway, getting everyone to look, or rushing for ear plugs, all the better. Toting around a honkin’ leaf blower probably helps too.

I get very annoyed at that little kid ‘hey look at me’ syndrome, but also feel sorry for those poor souls who can only make themselves feel better by surrounding themselves with mastodonic possessions. I bet they have to spend much more time at work to pay for this towering pile of crap, compared to someone with no ego problem, who can gleefully tool around in a tiny little car. My guess is that the confident person also gets to enjoy a lot more leisure time, having saved all that money not spent trying to shatter the sound barrier, having to buy extension ladders to get into and out of that big truck, and not buying useless crap such as leaf blowers.