Back in October, I took on housemates because I couldn’t afford rent. Laying around all summer, instead of earning heaps of money like I usually do, took a big toll on more than my health. Originally three people moved in, but Grandma went back to Poland after a month, leaving me mother and 13 year old daughter.I was sure I’d get plenty of blog fodder, as they drove me up the wall and out of my house. But that didn’t happen. Mainly because they argue in Polish, so I don’t know what’s going on, but also because I love and respect them both.
Except for that one thing, when Mom started putting up the Christmas tree on Thanksgiving weekend.
Daughter and I worship the Grinch. He’s our hero. In fact, we’re still fighting over the grinch pants my aunt gave me during the holidays. When the tree got set up, we objected strenuously, begging her to at least wait until December, with me pointing out that it was the twelve days of Christmas, not 120. All to no avail. Up the tree went.
As we enter the third week of January, there’s no sign that the tree will ever be taken down. It’s time for it to go. I said so over the weekend.
"No." said mom. "Not until March. Maybe later."
Freak that. Daughter and I have begun a ‘dismantle the tree’ campaign, enlisting the animals. We're going to make good use of “Cat did it”, the most spoken phrase in the house, as all sorts of stuff, much of it ten times heavier than the cat, gets knocked down/over/off, during the cat’s daily insane flying fits.
Unfortunately, the tree has stoutly withstood the cat’s antics, so we have a plan, beginning with ornaments disappearing a few at a time, escalating to loose branches, a wobbly stand, and ending with wildly cavorting animals creating a big crash. We’ll have this sucker down before the end of the month. The two grinches in this house won’t grow bigger hearts like that pansy in the movie. Christmas is OVER!
The mission is well underway:
Search
Remove
Destroy!
And that dang red holiday crap carpet that makes me so want to pee on it is also outta here.
2 comments:
Do you really use "freak" and "freakin" as a substitute for ? ... shhhsshhhshhshshh, don't say it.Has your blog got a hidden "f..K" filter?
Hey I don’t want to lose my family friendly rating, because you know how innocent kids are. Yeah right; they’re so clean that I've challenged the 13 year old to a non-potty mouth duel, tired of the lack of imagination and creativity in repeating the same few swear words over and over and over. And at the rate she's filling her swear jar, I'll be able to afford that tropical vacation soon!
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